Here's my problem
The story sounds interesting, I just wish you would incorporate more of that into the animation. The bars and face and music is alright, it's cool...the loop could be longer and the animation should change up a bit, but overall I'd say it needs more work. I've never made a flash animation, so I don't know how long they take. But if say it took you a week to do that, then maybe spend two months on a flash animation to see how far into development you can get.